Wade Philips Gone

[Menzies]

But I think this man has the real answer.

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Jerry Jones Needs to Fire Himself.By David Whitley

Sorry, LeBron James and NFL fans everywhere. It doesn't matter that Wade Phillips cleaned out his office Monday so Jason Garrett could move in.

The Cowboys could have hired Jason Kidd or Jason Alexander or Jason Voorhees of "Friday the 13th" fame. As long as Jerry Jones is in charge, Dallas is destined to be a recurring horror show.

Well, maybe not as horrific as Sunday night. To say the Cowboys played like pathetic, heartless schlubs against Green Bay would be an insult to pathetic, heartless schlubs everywhere.

After the nationally televised 45-7 wipeout, James, speaking on behalf of Cowboys fans, tweeted "This is just ridiculous man!!!!!"

Even Dallas haters were wincing. The NFL is a lot more fun when the Cowboys are relevant. They're so bad you almost feel guilty picking on them.

Almost.

Sunday night was the worst live performance on NBC since Ashlee Simpson's lip-sync machine went haywire on "Saturday Night Live.''

There's always Jones to kick around. I only wish Jerry had dropped all pretense and simply named himself head coach.

He's always fancied himself to be a football Megamind. Jones could have put on the headset for the final eight games and tried to make chicken salad out of the pile of feathers he's fashioned in Dallas.

He has been blinded by his own brilliance since buying the Cowboys in 1989. Never mind that all evidence points to a simple and obvious flaw in his management style.

Jones is great at marketing and cutting deals and building the world's most ostentatious stadium. You know, things owners are supposed to do.

Smart ones don't try to be general managers. They don't hire only coaches who double as bobble-head dolls.

Everybody agreed that Phillips was a nice fellow and good assistant-coach material. They said the same thing about Dave Campo and Chan Gailey. And if you liked to party, nobody could wear a lampshade on his head quite like Barry Switzer.

Beating the Redskins isn't like taking Omaha Beach, but it does require a bit of teamwork and discipline. Players know a ventriloquist dummy when they see one. When Jones' coaches speak, nobody listens.

With no accountability or leadership, teams don't just lose when things get tough. They collapse into embarrassment. Sunday night was the worst live performance on NBC since Ashlee Simpson's lip-sync machine went haywire on "Saturday Night Live." The only thing missing was Jones doing a little hoe-down jig and then rushing offstage in utter humiliation.

Darn, I wish I'd taped it.

Watching a man choked by his own hubris is always enjoyable. But you have to feel sorry for the city of Dallas and the Cowboys' legacy. The only way out of this rut is for Jones to hire a real football coach and get out of the way. Jerry will give up his GM cap when they pry it from his cold, dead fingers.

He couldn't stand it when Jimmy Johnson and Bill Parcells treated him like a fantasy-league geek. Jerry threw away the dynasty Jimmy had built. After three straight 5-11 seasons under Campo, Jones had to bring in a proven coach like Parcells. Let's return to his drunken explanation that made YouTube this spring:

"He's not worth a (bleep), but I wanted -- they were on my (bleep) so bad. J's gotta have a Yes Man. So to get the (bleeping) stadium, I need to bring his (bleep) in."

That bleeping Parcells inevitably tired of Jones' meddling, but left the franchise much better off than when he showed up. The Cowboys had 13 Pro Bowl players, and at least half of them were legit.

The rest were products of the Cowboys' Vortex. Everything that enters gets overrated. This year was a classic example, with Dallas coming off an 11-5 season and a playoff win last season.

Name another GM who could survive 15 years without a playoff win. But never mind that, Jerry's kids were hyped to become the first hometown Super Bowl team. Now they've been exposed as old, slow and spineless.

This job calls for a complete fumigation. The name you hear most is Bill Cowher, but he's nobody's bobble-head. The Cowboys' mystique might be enough to lure Jon Gruden or Brian Billick, but they'd inevitably get sick of Jones.

"Don't imply there that my role is going to change at all," he said after the Green Bay debacle. "Don't do that. You'll get something stuck."

Nobody was quite sure what would get stuck, other than the Cowboys. Like Jason Voorhees with his hockey mask and machete, Jerry refuses to go away.

There was one hope, but Jones blew it Monday. Why, oh why, couldn't he have named himself the Cowboys' coach?

That's the only way he'll ever realize what a dope the Cowboys' owner is.

Edited November 9, 2010 by Menzies

[crash1371]

Wade had been on the fade for awhile we new it was just a matter of time

[Menzies]

Oh come on - wasn't everyone tipping them for the Superbowl in their own stadium just over two months ago?

So if he was on the fade - he sure fooled a lot of folks!

[crash1371]

Well this season has been a eye opener, and that Wade was not the guy to continue on as a coach there was no control. Oh yes you are right they where very much picked by many to be supper bowl contenders. Maybe they can work the concession stands now